💩 Code Brown Survivor | 20oz Fecal Warfare Tumbler
$32.00
This is not just a tumbler. It’s a Purple Heart for your GI trauma.
💩🪖🔥 Decorated for valor. Still smells like trauma.
This 20oz stainless steel tumbler honors your survival through the unspeakable: Code. Brown. Level 7. You’ve held the line when the bed exploded, the patient denied everything, and the smell slapped everyone in a 10-foot radius. Pour yourself a hot one. You earned this… and the PTSD.
💀 Code Brown Debrief Log:
✅ Containment achieved: Barely. Still twitching.
✅ Scent neutralized: 3 masks, 2 sprays, 1 regret.
❌ Memory erased: Not even close.
❌ Hazard pay: LOL. Keep dreaming.
📦 Fast Nurse Shipping: Ships faster than that smell spreads.
❝ Patient said they ‘just needed to pee.’ Ten towels later, I’ve aged a decade. This tumbler is my only reward. ❞ — Morgan S., Med-Surg, Arizona
❓ FAQ (Wipe-Ready):
🧠 Dishwasher safe? — Yep. Sadly, you are too.
📏 Size? — 20oz of post-trauma hydration.
🎁 Giftable? — For anyone who’s seen unspeakable things.
🩺 Work-approved? — Only if they’ve earned the badge.
🔥 3 people are eyeing this now — don’t wait!
🚚 Flat $4.99 shipping — Patience ran out before your shift did. Free over $35.