🧠 Vitals Stable. Sanity Pending. | White Nurse Tumbler 20oz
$28.95
Vitals: stable. Sanity: Pending.
🧠😵💫☕ Because the only thing holding you together is caffeine and spite.
This isn’t just a tumbler. It’s a cry for help in stainless steel. 20oz of emotional containment for your rage, sarcasm, and dangerously low serotonin levels. Take it to your next 12-hour trauma parade and let your drink stay hot while your soul stays cold.
☠️ Your Coping Mechanism Checklist:
✅ Caffeine Hot: Sanity still iced.
✅ Spill-Proof: Unlike your mental breakdown.
❌ Therapy: Not covered. Sip instead.
❌ Staff Meeting Attendance: Politely declined.
📦 Ships Fast: Before your morale completely vanishes.
❝ I brought this to work and someone asked how I’m doing. I just pointed to the cup. 15/10 would trauma bond again. ❞ — Kyle M., ER, Arizona
❓ Survival FAQs (No HR filters):
🧼 Dishwasher safe? — More than we can say about your boundaries.
📐 Size? — 20oz of deadpan hydration and sarcasm.
🎁 Gift idea? — For every nurse who’s officially unwell.
🏥 Work-friendly? — Only if you’re OK being “talked to” by management.
🔥 3 people are eyeing this now — don’t wait!
🚚 Flat $4.99 shipping — Patience ran out before your shift did. Free over $35.